Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Patrick and I are currently watching The Office (American version). We were hesitant to start this series, since we were under the impression that nothing could compare to the beloved Ricky Gervais. But we finally bit the bullet, and were more than pleasantly surprised! We are on season 3 already and wow, that's entertainment!
My favorite character is Dwight, but then again, they are all so special in their own ways. Here are some memorable quotes:
When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins, and they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissues made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.
Michael Scott: You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded.
I think one of the greatest things about modern America is the computerization of medical records. As a volunteer sheriff, I can look up anyone's psychiatric records or surgical histories. Yeast infections... there are a huge number of yeast infections in this county. Probably because we''re downriver... from that old bread factory.
Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. It is like this tangible thing that you can point to and say 'Hey man, I love you this many dollars worth.'
In the sixties, I made love to many, many women. Often outdoors. In the mud and the rain. And it's possible a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing.
Business is like a jungle. And I am like a tiger. And Dwight is like a monkey that stabs the tiger in the back with a stick. Does the tiger fire the monkey? Does the tiger transfer the monkey to another branch? Pun. There is no way of knowing what goes on inside the tiger's head. We don't have the technology.
Okay. This is it. This is exactly what Michael Moore does. Famous documentor. He goes up to people with a camera and he's like 'Why did you do this? Why did you pollute? You are bad. Bad person.' It's very dramatic. Oh I can't say I was a big fan of 'Bowling for Columbine', because I thought it was going to be a bowling movie like Kingpin. And it wasn't. It was something else.
When I die, I want to be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever because I will have used that time to figure out exactly why I died, and what moves I could've used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in.
Did you know that gay used to mean 'happy?' When I was growing up, it meant 'lame.' And now, it means a man who makes love to other men. We're all homos. Homo sapiens.
Posted by Ash at 1:58 PM