a poem for a year

one year ago we lost you in the early morning hours
funny how time can project so far forward and yet fold in on itself
all in one breath; one thought
one raw emotion.

looking back at a blur that was
that nearly consumed us
i'm struck by your fearlessness in the face of it all
despite the haze, the drugs, the pain
your essence was altogether coherent.
constant.

stubborn, unyielding, as was your way
you clung to us - to life
in those last hours
until finally returning to
the salt of the earth.

the scar has healed but
still, a spec of pink
bubbled over a tingly core.

let's not pick apart
that last chapter
of calamity
night terrors and bile.

focus on the calm,
the normalcy that was
before it began.

I miss you showing me the flyers. I miss your calm, appreciative nature. I miss the shine of your rhinestones off the kitchen mirrors. Your laugh. Your quiet determination. Your willingness for peace. I even miss the way you always reminded me of the correct way to play with the kitty. I see hints of you everywhere and I am trying hard not to let the little, everyday details slip through the cracks of time. Please don't scare me in the dark, though. I know you would love a little trick like that.

We miss you Patsy and you are forever in our thoughts.

Another post in the same week - yay me! I have been taking some time off from the gym to nurse this reoccurring cold, so I have had more scrapbooking time on my hands, seen here. I think I'm even going to clean off my scrap desk and pull out some stuff very soon while Pat is busy with clients. I have some new Dear Lizzy stuff, as well as some new K&Company. Oh, and a new scalloped circle bunch and a fresh stack of white cardstock. And, a new cutting mat for my Silhouette. Sounds like I could keep myself quite occupied. Man, it's crazy how much scrapbooking stuff I manage to accumulate... Terrible, terrible (but wonderful) addiction!

In different new, some players from the Alouettes visited our school today. They played basketball against the teachers (not me!!) while 400 students cheered them on. And by cheered, I mean screamed and yelled like frantic maniacs while flailing inflatable rods that were handed out by the Als. Hahahaha! Try keeping students tame... My poor little guys were complaining about how noisy it was! Still, it was a lot of fun and the guys were very good sports. They kept us quite entertained even though they completely creamed us! But Stace, there were really none that were appealing, so don't worry, you didn't miss much ;) In the same vein, what a complete turn-off to discover that a man who is seemingly quite buff on the upper portion actually has chicken legs. Ick. Big calves are totally sexy to me. Along with good pecs and lats. And we'll throw in some stubble and big-ass sideburns while we're at it. Voila.

Okay, time for me to go experiment with my new scrappy products. Enjoy your Friday demain!

Present Obsessions

Hello y'all, how's it hanging? I'm a few minutes away from the covers and a good book. But right now I felt like depositing some thoughts, in no particular order. I'm a little spazy at the moment, so bare with me. I am currently quite entranced by the idea of looking for condos or houses. Like, possibly obsessed. I know that I'm just dreaming of possibilities in the future. But still, it's fun to imagine and then plot for hours on end... I am going to book a visit to one place in particular rather soon, just to get a feel for it in real life. I know that it would probably be wise to wait another year before getting our own place, but I really, really want to right now. We shall see how that works out in the next little while. Can it be attributed to spring fever? Not sure.

What else is going on? I have allergies or a cold of some sort. Yes, again. It's really sad, actually. I am assured by colleagues, though, that it's very normal for the first year of teaching. I'm toughening my immune system apparently. Well, I hope so. I thought that working in daycare for years was prep enough, but apparently not. What can you do?

I thought these pictures were the funniest thing ever. These two were getting rather cozy together whilst sharing some afternoon nappy time. Should I be jealous? (PS, nice butt crabby Patty).

Sagua, I love you and your ridiculous behavior. I'm not sure if I bug you more than you bug me; I think we have a nice little love/hate relationship going. But please stop trying to steal my boyfriend.... hahaha....

Alright, I said I would be in bed soon and I've wasted tons of time on here. So much for an early night. Cheers!

Hump De Bump

Not really in the mood for blogging lately. I tend to get caught up reading other peoples' blogs and then have no motivation left over for my own words. Need to get back into the writing groove. March break has come and gone and already I am looking forward to Easter break! Don't get me wrong, I have a great job and I love my kiddies, but I am so very tired right now. I think the basement reno has really done me in, since it's infringing on my personal space and down time, you know? I cannot wait to have my own place. I am so, so ready.

I took a break from the gym this evening since my body had been complaining. I seem to have re-activated an old injury in the shoulder and it blows. I am so tense on my right side, and admittedly, tapping away in front of this screen is no help. But I was in the mood to get some thoughts down, and came up with a digi page. So alas, I am at least productive in one domain. I tend to focus on my long-lost hobby when Patrick is busy with clients, like he is this evening. Wow, my thoughts are really all over the place. I apologize.

I am starting to worry that LOST is going to be a major let down. I really, really hope they can pull it off, but with ten episodes to go, I'm kinda biting my nails. I know I should have faith, but it's kinda hard with so little info... I suppose they're doing it on purpose to make us feel connected to what the characters themselves are going through... I did enjoy last night's Ben-centric storyline. It felt a lot more genuine than any of the other bits and pieces they've been stitching together the last little while. I hate how they think they have time to delve into these new figures - they come off so flat!!! Ben's confession had so much sustenance, no? Anywho... I am nowhere near as obsessed as I know some are out there. I haven't invested as much thought or effort into trying to figure out the island's mysteries... but I do read this blog and it keeps me kinda enlightened enough.

Alright, well I just got a call from my man so time for me to peace out. Here's that layout I was talkin 'bout. Cheers!

March Break!!!

Why hello - I'm on March Break! I finally get to appreciate of the huge perks of being a teacher, although I can't seem to get my teacher brain to shut off. Today I actually make posters for my class (full-on coloring on bristol boards) - I know, I'm completely nutso. But I enjoy it. Plus, my computer had crashed and my wonderful boyfriend was fixing it. So I figured it would be a good way to keep myself busy while he worked. Also, my basement is a complete disaster zone at the moment because my mom has decided to replace the tacky 80's wood paneling with some modern paneling. It's going to look great in the long run, but right now I have no access to my work-out equipment or scrapbooking stash, which sucks! At least now my computer is fixed so I can do some digi scrapping!

I am so excited to have a full week off. Here are some fun things that I'm gonna do:

1. Indoor swimming (finally gonna check that off the want-to-do list)
2. Trip to Burlington with the girlies (yes, shopping and Olive Garden coming my way)
3. Going to the Grande-Biblio downtown (I've been meaning to go for ages now)
4. Attend a Stampin'Up party hosted by one of my colleagues (and try not to spend too much $)
5. Treat Patrick to a Spa day

I'm liking the sounds of this itinerary. Anyways, I'm gonna get going but wanted to share a page I did a while back.

February Stars...

Today was a good day. I got good news from the doctors (nothing to be worried about anymore), then spent some time scrapping. Patrick and I even went skating for the first time ever together. Pat just got some new skates - the kind that mold to your feet - and was testing them out. It was really fun, actually. I rented some men's skates, but I think I may invest in a pair. Here's something really funny: all of the children at the arena happened to be students at the school that I work at. I was a little nervous about that at first, but then I figured, what the heck - at least they can see a teacher having fun in a different context... They all seemed really happy and surprised to see me, so I guess I worried for nothing.

Patrick took me to Alt hotel over the weekend for V-day. We had a fun/relaxing time. We watched our favorite movie.

We jumped on the bed.

We ordered in. And I captured my new favorite photo.

There are other happenings to be blogged about, but I'll save that for another day. Goodnight.

current TV addictions

We're really into this right now. It's our new HBO obsession, although we take it in small doses (like, max two episodes per evening, or we regress too much). I recommend it if you're into that random, awkward type of humor, which we clearly are. The songs are incredibly catchy, in a Jon Lajoie sort of way. And the cute accents and mullets don't hurt either.

In other television news, my favorite show ever starts up again tomorrow night, except I can't watch it "live" since Pat has clients... So I will have to wait (shameful, I know). But if I've waited this long, another little while won't hurt, right? It will be very hard to block out the chatter in the staff room the next day, but I will resist all influences until I've witnessed the episode first hand. In case you're wondering what I'm referring too... hello!! I'm fully aware that this topic deserves a separate and sacred blog post on its own, so I will be back with that in few days, hopefully with at least some answers to the questions that have been intriguing us all.

Time for me to go to bed. I am still sick, this time with a raspy voice that is apparently sexy. I'm not too sure, but I'll take it. Goodnight blog stalkers.